| | Bacon Cheeseburger & Garlic Fries
Sometimes, all you want is a good old fashioned burger.
The kind that you pick up with two hands and can barely fit into your
mouth -- but when you do, and you bite into it; your mouth is filled
with hot, savory burger juice and dripping, melted cheddar.
Guys, want to know why you need to learn how to cook?
I've got a guest tonight. I met her earlier
today in the dairy section of our local supermarket. We're eating
our bacon cheeseburgers and garlic fries with a six-pack of Stella
Artois in my living room while watching Michael Bisping beating the snot
out of Josh Haynes in the season finale of The Ultimate Fighter 3 off
of my Tivo.
I noticed she was confused, looking at the various kinds of cream over
and over, and so I stepped up and asked her what she was making.
She told me she was going to try making Fettucine Alfredo. I
explained to her what she would get if she used the different kinds of
cream, and if she used the Half-and-Half she kept picking up and
putting back. I brought her to the cheese, and told her what
she'd get with different kinds of parmesan. I told her to use the
fresh noodles instead of the dried for the soft texture. We
started talking,
and now she's here on my sofa.
It could happen to you. Learn how to cook.
* * * * *
Today we're going to learn how to make a good burger.
It's so
simple yet so many people screw it up -- especially when they think
that by making it more complicated and "gourmet", they're going to make
it better. No. By making your burger more complicated, you fuck it up.
There are
simple concepts and ideas to follow when making a good burger -- shit
they don't teach you at the CIA or Le Cordon Bleu... shit you learn
from experience, spending hundreds of hours at summer backyard
barbeques over the course
of your life.
To make a good burger, you go back to the basics.
At the core, a burger is a patty of ground beef. You have several
options here. The best way to do it is to buy a chuck roast and
grind it yourself either by hand or through the meat grinding
attachment on your Kitchenaid stand mixer. Chuck is the best beef
to use for a burger. If your supermarket or butcher can grind the
chuck for you (which most can -- just ask), even better. The
popular ground Sirloin is beefy, but is often too lean and produces a
dry burger. Regular ground beef is made up of a lot of different
cuts, so you could very well be getting ground Filet Mignon in
it.
The ideal meat to fat proportion for a burger meat is 80% meat, 20%
fat. You can go down to 15% fat, but any less and your burger
will be dry. Burgers are not meant to be healthy. Burgers
are meant to ooze tasty juice and cheese into your mouth. When
you want to eat something healthy, eat something that was meant to be
healthy. Don't try making a low-fat burger, it doesn't
work. You can go up to 30% fat, but be aware that your burger
will shrink a lot because the fat seeps out.
If you buy your ground beef pre-ground make sure you cook it
immediately and at least medium-well because all
that exposed meat surface provides a breeding ground for bacteria to
work and ground meat spoils quickly. If you have a meat grinder
though, you can dry-age your whole chuck primal, trim it, and then make
yourself a wonderful dry-aged burger nice and medium-rare. If
you've never had one, it will blow your mind.
The equipment is important in this case. Do not attempt this with
a regular nonstick frying pan. First of all, overheated non-stick
surfaces can render you infertile and cause other health problems,
nevermind the fact that it can kill your pets via Teflon
Toxicosis. Second, a non-stick pan is not going to give you the proper sear. Do this either with a heavy stainless steel pan or
even better, just go buy the $12 dollar Lodge Logic Cast Iron Skillet
already. It's a kitchen necessity if you're going to make recipes
from thousandthdish (pick up the Grill Pan too while you're at it).
If you follow these procedures precisely, you will have a good burger.
INGREDIENTS:
BACON CHEESEBURGER:
1 lb. ground beef (read above)
2 Potato buns
2 Tbsp. mayonnaise
2 slices SHARP cheddar cheese
2 slices red onion
2 slices tomato
1 strip bacon, cut in half and fried
2 pieces green or red leaf lettuce
Sea or Kosher Salt, Cracked Black Peppercorns
GARLIC FRIES:
1 lb. Steak Fries
1/2 stick UNSALTED butter
6 cloves garlic, chopped
2 Tbsp loosely packed parsley, chopped
Salt
PROCEDURE:
Before you even start cooking, prep your
condiment ingredients and cook your bacon
and your fries.
You may bake the fries if you wish. I put
mine in the deep-fryer.
Salt your fries.
Spread a layer of mayonnaise on the bottom
half of your bun. I don't care if you don't like
mayonnaise. Just spread it thin. This is the
secret to keeping the juices from running into
your bun and making it soggy. The mayo
repels the juices and keeps them where they
should be.
I like Chipotle mustard on this burger.
Wet your hands. Form your beef patty into a
circle a little greater in diameter than your bun
to allow for shinkage. Do not compress your
burger. Pat it loosely.
Press salt and cracked peppers into surface and
form a slight concave depression toward the
center to compensate for the "puffing" effect.
 Place on screaming hot cast iron pan. and sear
on high heat for 4 minutes on both sides or until
internal temperature reaches 160 degrees F, or
until it suits your level of cooked-ness.
Do not flip it more than once. Do not press on
your burger. In fact, do not touch it at all. THIS
is the secret to a good burger. Leave it alone.
When you make burgers in cast iron, THIS is
the kind of crispy crust you get on them.
Place cheese on burger, cover with lid for 1
minute.
Remove lid, scrape off melted browned oozing
cheese goodness from pan and pile onto burger.
Remove burger from pan and place onto your
bun and assemble your burger: Patty, cheese,
bacon, red onion, tomato, lettuce.
Melt butter in pan. Add garlic and stir under
low heat until garlic becomes tender. Add
parsley, stir for another minute.
Pour mixture over your fries and toss to coat.
Plate and Serve. EAT IMMEDIATELY.
* * * * *
Once you have the basic burger making technique down, feel free to experiment with alternative toppings.
Do not, however, start putting stuff IN the burger meat. You will
go to the bad place. This only causes burger structure
instability and is likely to cause your burger to fall apart on you either when
you're cooking or when you're eating it. The burger meat should
be pure, with only salt and pepper pressed ONTO it before
cooking. In fact, before adding additional condiments, try this
burger with just salt and pepper and a mayo'ed bun. You will be
surprised at how good JUST this tastes.
Other winning topping combinations include:
- Sauteed Mushrooms and Onions with Swiss Cheese
- Bleu Cheese, Bacon and Onion Rings
- Kimchi and SHARP Cheddar Cheese
- Fried Egg, Bacon and Provolone Cheese
If making the Kimchi burger, don't add the Onions, Lettuce and
Tomato. Just Kimchi and Cheese. Don't knock it until you
try it. It's good shit. It works well with both the crisp
fresh crunch of fresh kimchi and especially well with the deep, rich,
fermented taste of sheen kimchi. I put both on the burger.
The burger is all about getting the basics down right. No matter
what you decide to put on your burger, if you stick to the basic
techniques and use your new knowledge of burger making, you WILL have a
winning burger. So go out and get yourself that $12 dollar Cast
Iron Skillet, invite somebody over, and get yo' thang goin on. Because a good burger is sex like that. Enjoy.
EDIT: I replaced the link with one that has Free Super-Saver shipping.
EDIT2: There are good burgers that have stuff in the burger, but
only attempt these when you have a good understanding of the basic
burger. Among these, the bleu-cheese and butter stuffed
burger. Good stuff.
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| | Posted 8/31/2006 11:04 AM - 594 Views - 324 eProps - 191 comments
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